The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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