Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
