Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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