I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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