she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Randomize
