if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
