I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
