Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize