I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Randomize
