so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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