only if we run a train.
done.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
