If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I want her autograph on my taint
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
