weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
