words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
