I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
