I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
