ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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