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The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
