He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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