found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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