I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
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