Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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