More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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