I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
