So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
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