Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
