I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
