no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
