i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
