This is not my ceiling
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
He felt like a one man threesome
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
