I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
