what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
