I like my sex mixed with concussions.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
