Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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