This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
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