dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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