There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Randomize
