how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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