I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
