My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
