just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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