Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
