ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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