I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
