Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
