Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
