if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
