I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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