Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize