11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
