Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
the liver wants what the liver wants
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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